At the beginning of the year, I had this company from China start asking questions about my “brand.” “We have a client that is in the process of registering their brand, and after doing some quick research we found that you are currently using Unbreakable Sara and have registered domains.”
I was thinking to myself, well duh. At first the emails were cordial, but when I told them that I wasn’t willing to simply “give up the rights” to my brand, it got ugly quickly. So here we are, flustered and feeling defeated and getting back into the swing of things at the office. So much change was happening in the office and I didn’t have time to fight with someone from China about my brand, if you can even call it that.
I didn’t need to hear about any of that at the time. I was already stressed with work, and having some random guy emailing and being salty wasn’t exactly helping the situation. I let it all go, no need to hang on to frustration that I can’t do anything about what that company does. But what about work?
Changing of the Guard
Remember, in mid-2018 when I change jobs? With the new year came changes to the team. I’m still there, but things are different, and quite frankly adjusting had been a challenge. With the changes on the team, and the workload significantly increasing, things had become difficult.
I’d been working crazy hours again, but managed to meet my deadlines with grace. It has a lot do with staying focused on what you can do instead of what can’t be done.
Things changed, so what? It’s all about how you react to the change. I’m not going to lie, at first it was difficult. Like any major change, there’s a process to coping with it. I hit the acceptance stage pretty quickly, though.
I can’t change things out of my control, I can only learn to adapt.
Adapting Ain’t Easy
How does one adapt? Think of adapting like driving to somewhere from your home, like work, just as you do every day. One day, though, there’s construction and you’re forced to take a detour due to road closures. You have no choice, but to change your route. You’ve adapted to the situation.
We’re faced with change every day, especially as parents of children with special needs. One moment, could be just fine, and then you’re walking into a doctor’s appointment and find yourself having to head to the hospital.
Is it easy? Not always. Do you have to adapt to new situations? Most definitely.
Now, the question of how you adapt is completely up to you. You can fight the change tooth and nail, but what will that do for you? You can accept that change is inevitable and adapt with the situation.
The Struggle is Real with Adaption
Boy, how I struggle with change and adaptation.
I can remember vividly listening to a neurologist explain to me what they could about Riley’s brain. It was almost an out of body experience. I felt like I was numb. The reality was that I was overdosing on information. I couldn’t process all that gut-wrenching, emotionally painful information all at once.
Acceptance wasn’t even part of the process at that time. Adaptation was being considered, but how? I have this beautiful child laying in an incubator in NICU. I’m being told to hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.
Change can be hard.
Think about that scenario a different way, though. You have no control over what’s happened, you can only adapt to the future. I can’t control what’s happened. It’s done. What I can change is my path going forward. How will I care for my daughter? As best as I damn well can. I will learn all I can to help with therapies, PT, OT, ST. I will be the best advocate for her needs. I will be supermom.
From Acceptance to Super Mom
Although I’m not always supermom, I’ve become pretty awesome at being Riley’s Mom. I’ve adapted from what I knew about being a mom of a typical child and became a special needs mom.
Strangely enough, special needs parenting isn’t much different, there’s just added levels of stress. Has anyone ever noticed that you don’t worry about one child more than another just because they have special needs? I’m pretty much an equal opportunity worrier.
Change will always occur. It’s about how you meet that change that defines your character. Acceptance and adaptation, these are your friends.
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference.”